Thursday, February 11, 2010

Dear Weight Loss Fairy

I have been in search of you my whole life. Where have you been hiding? I have no need of glass slippers, ball gowns, or a carriage drawn by horses. (although those things are all perfectly lovely) I am in need of something more, that must not end at the stroke of twelve. I too have been enslaved, enslaved and surrounded by good food, sweet evil nectar (Chery Coke), and a love for ice cream that does not love me back. I am afraid that my waist line has suffered the most, hips coming in at a smooth second. I have given my body over to creation on several occasions (not that I didn't enjoy these 4 wonderful opportunities) But the time has come to claim back my body and make some much needed improvements. I could really use your help in this area, for I have MUCH to loose and hope to GAIN no more. I will do my best to help in these efforts I will not rely on you alone. I will commit to exercise 3 or more times a week and I have loosened the evil nectar's grasp on me ( 1 1/2 months without). I will try to make better choices as to what I consume. Will you please use your secret powers to melt the pounds away and keep them at bay. Please come and arm me so that when the temptations come (and I know they will come) Help me to stave them off and not give into their empty calories. When my body is sore an tired help me to keep fighting and working toward our goal. when I start to look at the treadmill as my ultimate enemy please help me to see past the outer appearance of things and see that it is really a true friend to help me on my quest. If this letter finds you, please come promptly you are much needed.

With love
Mrs. B. Hansen

P.S. That Zumba class you endorse kicked my hinney. I had a great time, loads of fun, the hour and a half flew by. But today my legs are sore, my abs are aching, and I think I found some new muscles in my back that I wasn't aware of. I will return and get kicked around some more.

6 comments:

Cher said...

YOu crack me up! What the heck is ZUMBA and why havent I heard about it. I mean EVERYONE is talking about it but I have no IDEA. Shocker..but its true. ANYWAY good luck and A cherry coke is in the mail!! JK

Jo said...

You're funny! I had no idea there was a weight loss fairy. Put in a good word for me will ya?! I'm hoping the warmer weather will be more motivating for me. We can do this!!!

Jen said...

Good job on the cherry coke thing-look at what you've done so far. You can do anything you set your mind to when you look back and see how much you've accomplished already.

Kara said...

I have no idea what ZUMBA is either, but it sounds like torture--may it bring lots of results in exchange for the pain =). Great job on eliminating the evil nectar and I'm sure you'll do great with everything, though I'm sending extra good luck your way just for a boost. I hope you'll ask the weight loss fairy to come my way when your done too please.

MIA said...

You are hilarious! Hello awesome writing skills! You should take that up too along with all of your other talents! I want to be you when I grow up. (someday)

aimee said...

You are hilarious....How are you? Sign up for a half marathon with me. It will force you to get out and train just because you have signed up plus we have tons to catch up on which will make the time go faster...I am serious! You will only hate your treadmill for the first few months.